My Family

Lord, I thought about entering different posts in the various accounts for my family members.  Maybe I will cut and paste the appropriate parts of this entry into the right places later, if I have time.  For now, I just want to get some prayer time before the MOPS steering meeting, which is supposed to happen here (Barnes & Noble Worcester) in a little over an hour.

George: I have become interested in the idea of praying for him "head to toe," as the title of the book suggests.  Up until now, I had only the sample.  I just ordered the full Kindle version, and I look forward to using February to go through the book and the prayer discipline.  He said via text that he was on his way home--already!!--to feed MY dog, Rocky.  :)  Yeah, right.  Rocky is tethered to George all weekend long, and rightly so.

I just took a peek at the prayers.  They are quite wonderful!  May they become my prayers for George, and may You grant them to bless him and draw him closer to You and us closer to each other.

Amy: Ahhh...I went over to Facebook to look at her page and posts, and tears come to my eyes.  She is so loved by the Mexicans at La Casa, and she so loves them right back.  I know, Lord, that she is praying about spending at least the summer in San Diego and spending much of that time over the border.  My prayer for her is this: that You would guide her and lead her in the way You want her to go, and that she would follow.  I know she mentioned not wanting to upset "Grandma," and that is a wonderfully loving consideration.  Let Your will be done!  Grandma is worried about losing Amy to the West Coast not for any really selfish reason, but because she loves her (both ways round) so much.  Please work this out, and provide for Amy's financial needs according to Your riches in glory!

Julie:  ThankYouThankYouThankYouThankYouThankYou!  Her 1st week in Morocco--which, after all, is not quite over yet--sounds like You just dumped a bucket of blessings on her.  By extension, we feel blessed, too!  The flights went smoothly, the first hotel was wonderful, the car/shuttle driver from the airport was anointed by You, and best of all, her home-stay family sounds WONDERFUL!!    (With Western toilets and showers--LOL!)  She is thinking deeply about some potentially upsetting issues about children and poverty, which thrills me and scares me at the same time.  Please allow the remainder of her time in Morocco to be just as blessed, and ... I am not quite sure I have the authority to ask You to use her to expand Your boundaries, since everyone needs to invite You to do that for themselves.  Still, my mother's heart begs for Your protection, for Your leading, for Your teaching her deep and wonderful things, and most of all, for Your continued work IN her life.

Okay~~wandering time over to the MOPS website!  Please use me in this meeting, and grant me much wisdom about what to say, if anything, and when to say it, and most of all, how to say what You want me to say.

Amen!

Bless Her, Indeed!

Bless Her, Indeed!

 

 

Julie's destination

Ahhh.  It is 9:24 a.m. and here I am, Lord!  Later than I had hoped, but I am keeping this “appointment” with you here in my office on Sever Street.  I have SO little time to spend in devoted, undistracted time with You.  (Not complaining—more confessing.)  So, let me get to the most pressing issue on my heart today: my younger daughter going to Morocco in just 5 days.

 

How do I feel about this trip?  It’s a funny mix of emotions.  I admit to a bit of fear and anxiety, and I wished (yes, past tense) that she would have gone to Eastern Europe instead.  However, I also think this is an adventure of a lifetime.  I am excited for her!  She has such a lot to do before Thursday, and I would please ask Your assistance to get it all done.  Sometimes she is not organized with regard to timing.  (I wonder if she inherited that from her father.  Haha!)  We need a couple of specific acts of grace from You: she needs her World Health Organization form signed before she leaves, and … okay, now I forget.  Oh, yeah.  She needs her contacts for 15 weeks.  Oy.  Grace, dear understanding Father.  Please?

Moreover, please pursue her during this time away from a lot of Christian fellowship.  I know, I am sometimes too arrogant about the weaknesses in many of my Christian family members.  Maybe even more than “sometimes.”  The sin of pride, right?  L  Well, I digress.  My prayer/desire/request for Julie is this: that her relationship with You might be strengthened and deepened during this time away, a relatively solitary and individual time for her faith.  Of course, humanly and maternally I ask for safety for her.  (I wonder what Your mother must have gone through, releasing You to danger and death.  I feel for her!)

And now, what?  It’s 9:49 a.m., and I expect my client in 10 minutes.  Bless her, too.  That’s an entry for another page.  J

I love You more than anyone else, and not enough, at the same time. 

In Jesus’s name~~Amen.

 

PS  Scott Hassett and Gail, Shayna, and the other daughter whose name I don’t think I ever put in my memory—Scott is dying of pancreatic cancer, and likely soon.  Do You remember Andrew, the Angel of Death from Touched By An Angel?  (Of course You do.)  They could use some angels to bring comfort, humor, and grace during Scott’s homegoing.  Make it wonderful, as wonderful as the death of a loved one can be, please?

Joey's ASVAB

(ASVAB stands for Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery.)

Father, that dear nephew by Bill, Joey, posted his ASVAB score on Facebook today.  It is a below average score, not surprising for those of us who know and love Joey.  The specific subtests seem to be important to indicate what kinds of jobs he might have, should the military still take him.

What do I want to talk about with You?  About Joey?  Well, let's see.  I would so much like to see him feel secure and loved, not only by us but by You.  I am afraid that his parents and their example and influence in his life have hardened his heart to spiritual things.  So perhaps that really ought to be the first focus of prayer--softening his heart.  YOU are the One to do this, and as Your child/minister/servant, I am willing to be used by You to assist in this work.  It is a great work!  Rescuing lost souls is a harder job than I ever thought, and much more subtle than just preaching on a street corner.  Ahhhh.

So, if only by virtue of my telling him that I am talking to You about him, please assure him that You are interested in his life.  That You care deeply about his future and his happiness.  That You are so committed to him that You even died in his place for his sins which, unforgiven, would keep him in hell forever.  In Jesus's name, by the work of the Holy Spirit, and to Your glory~~Amen.



Prayer for CE?

Hello, Lord.  Don't take the dates difference between these posts to indicate that I have not prayed.  You know that!  Just now on Facebook, one of the Junior Church teachers with a learning disabled (maybe) daughter, Kassidy, asked for prayer for Kassidy's midterm exam tomorrow.  I am honored to partner with You in prayer in Kassidy's life.  So....

Dearest Heavenly Father, how often we humans fail the "tests" that You place before us.  Too often.  For a young person with learning challenges, the struggle with tests is not only academic but spiritual.  Lord, would You honor Kassidy by allowing her a decently passing grade?  More importantly, dear God, would You calm her heart in an extraordinary Divine way that can come only from You?  Help her to pass the test to "be anxious for nothing."  But--remind her to pray with thanksgiving!  We love her and her mom, Lord God.  Please use this trial to prove Yourself to her, to strengthen the bond that she has with You, and to be exalted and glorified.  In Jesus's wonderful name~~Amen.

Another thing, dear God.  This one has the potential to be twitchy.  I think I need to communicate with the pastor of our church about the state of CE, specifically Junior Church but touching on Nursery as well.  I am NOT good at this.  In fact, I am actively avoiding writing this letter.  Maybe I will keep it 95% newsy and positive.  Please inspire me.  I don't think I will write it tonight.  I will, however, continue to ask Your thoughts and direction on it.  Please give me an outline of what to say.  I also need You to help me, my Ezer, with the annual report due next week.  I would continue to embrace these ministries with zeal and excitement if I did not have so many distractions in my life, you know.  I wish HBC would hire a Children's Ministry Coordinator.

Okay, I told our daughter that I would try to be home by 7:30 p.m.  I don't have much time left.  Sometimes I just need to sit long enough for the distractions in my head to drift off and allow the important, heavy issues to remain behind.  A whole day...what a dream!

I love You so much!  Be exalted!  Jesus, the most beautiful name that I know.

Scott Hassett, HBC Elder

Scott has been on my heart lately, dear Father.  What a blow to him and his family to be diagnosed with Stage 4 pancreatic cancer!  I am without words to pray.  I just posted a picture of the tree pin that I got from Scott.  I hope that others will respond and pray for him, remember his struggle and the suffering of the family, and bring him--as I am doing now--before Your throne of grace.

Pray for one another.  Didn't You say that a few times in Scripture?  Yup, in James 5:16 and specifically "so that you may be healed."  I could use healing, too, Lord, but Scott needs some physical miracle so much more than I do right now.  Again, though, I have no idea exactly what to ask You to do.  Bring him relief of pain; bring Gail relief of anxiety; bring them both amazingly, so much closer to You through this awful time.  Be glorified!  In Jesus's most powerful name, Who healed bodies to show that that's the easy part, and that healing souls and forgiving sin is the way harder thing to do~~Amen.

Ending 2013

Lord, I may have only about 10 minutes, if that, for this entry.  It's Your birthday week!  What a whirlwind it has been, and it's not over.  Still, it was a good week, but I am tired.  I just wanted to connect with You briefly before the craziness of the weekend and the New Year commences.

So, I didn't do as well as I wanted in keeping an Advent journal, but I did read the Advent devotional almost every day.  It was John Piper's "Good News of Great Joy."  He quoted Tim Keller at the end, and I cannot get the quote out of my mind:

"Humility is so shy.  If you begin talking about it, it leaves."

Oh, yes.  John Piper's final meditation talked about Jesus's humility and servanthood as noted in Philippians, which he called a Christmas text.  Well worth pondering, which I guess is what I am doing.

Well, not to be rude, but I really should get going.  The family won't understand the huge delay.  If only they knew that I need some time alone to journal...but George particularly would want to read what I write, and it is intended ONLY for You.

Happy Birthday, Jesus!

My Nephew Joe

Dear Father, my impulsive but courageous and good-hearted nephew Joe did something incredibly stupid recently.  He totaled a police cruiser that he was driving to a domestic dispute by running a red light.  Please, in Your great mercy so powerfully illustrated in the Christmas story, spare him the awful consequences of losing his job.  He was foolish.  We all know that--even he knows that.  But we have all been foolish.  Let this be an example of great grace, or wonderful forgiveness, of second chances and the opportunity to start again.  Please allow him to hold on to his job because he loves it, because his family needs it--and him, and because You are trying to get into his life.  We know that this is something that we can give to You to weave into Your plan for his life and ultimately his relationship with You--his salvation.  In Jesus's name~~Amen.

"Mommy's Mad!"

Dear Heavenly Father, I contracted with myself to spend some time in prayer before I returned to working on the talk for MOPS on Thursday.  Here I am.  I'm a little bit tired, but tonight was a gift.  My only client canceled (although for a horrible reason--her daughter is in jail and the father of the grandkids committed suicide in jail), and I came to Barnes and Noble to spend some time with You.  It's a date!  So would You meet me here?

(I took a moment or two to look for an old worship song I knew.  I couldn't find it, but the idea was "I'm here...Meet me here.")

Who but You knows how many women will be with us on Thursday?  Please bring the ones that need to come.  Let me be sensitive to them and to Carra's desire to get the wrapping done early--maybe by 8 p.m. so that she can leave.  Let me be both Biblically sound and clinically competent, which has been my career-long prayer.  Please give me exactly what someone needs, or several someones need, to be effective mothers and excellent examples of emotion management.

This is an honor to speak, of course, and I want to point women to You for their strength and wisdom in parenting.  I hope that I speak from the experience of relying on You for that strength and wisdom.  What would my daughters say?

Okay, the timer went off.  I will do a bit of research now and get a PowerPoint up, mostly for myself to stay on track.  "Bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory (my influence), and [may] your hand ... be with me, and [may] you ... keep me from harm!"  1 Chronicles 4:10

Urgent: Kimberly's Aunt

Dear Lord, I never again want to promise to pray without actually praying. Kimberly's Aunt Barbara is in a coma secondary to anoxia for 12 minutes (somehow related to hip replacement surgery). What is the appropriate prayer in a situation like this? Grace...comfort...wisdom...mercy! Lord, have mercy. I don't know how old Barbara is, but that doesn't really matter. Have mercy on her, on the family, and (from my perspective) specifically on Kimberly. Give her safe travel and the knowledge and experience of your presence. In the healing name of Jesus~~Amen.

The Best Daughters

Father God, I think this topic came to my mind because one of the deaf patients at the hospital recently lost her son to a gang shooting.  I began to wonder how I would feel, how I would cope, if my children made bad choices.  How grieved would I be?  How self-loathing, because at some level the thoughts almost always turn to blame for the parents for not raising the child properly?  How much time would I spend in pleading prayer for my babies?

I am amazingly grateful for the wonderful, Godly daughters I have.  Wow.  You done good, God!  :)  I think Julie is a bit more "liberal" than Amy, but she seems to be well grounded in the Word and in her relationship with you.  They both have big hearts for others, with the overriding purpose of loving them into the Kingdom.  Thank You.  That's all.  Just thank YOU.  And I will try to pray for them as much as I might if they were wayward.  They deserve that much of my prayer protection and attention, maybe more, to keep them close to You.

Barrington Nicols & Granny

I will have to make this super-quick, but I promised Kimberly I would pray, or had prayed, for Your will for "coverage" for Mary Ann while they sail the Caribbean next year. Please provide the right situation for Mary Ann. Kimberly is trying to be responsible for her while still being responsible for her own family. ???

George's Back

Lord, I probably "should" have done this earlier, even days ago.  The short story: making lasagna for George's family because we are going north to visit his mother (and everyone else) today.  So, I am sure you understand.

George's spine is sick.  Without boring you with the details that you already know thoroughly, I want to ask you officially to intervene.  He is painstakingly (and there is an emphasis on "pain") compliant with his stretching exercises.  He is also stubborn with respect to taking a pain reliever.  The best case scenario would be complete healing.  Is that in Your will?  In whatever way you step in, please bring him relief and a certainty that you have touched him.  Please reduce the pain.  I am impressed with how he hides his discomfort, but I do wish he would take something to help with it.  Especially today, with all his family, please make him comfortable.  He isn't terribly "comfortable" with them in the first place, and having pain is likely to make it less so.

In Jesus's name, out of love for my Godly and wonderful husband, and in the modern-day power of the Holy Spirit--Amen.

My Baby is Sick

Is there a way to make this work? I keep seeing "Error on page" at the bottom of this post. :(For the moment, I will write in HTML and not the Compose pane. So... Dear Father, You are the Healer. Healing is in Your hands. Please be merciful to my youngest daughter, Julie, and restore her health quickly. She is so responsible, and she takes seriously the commitments that she has to her education and her volunteer positions. Would You honor that and give her the rest, the healing rest, that she requires to allow You to fix her? Please strengthen her immune system and allow it to knock out the virus that I suspect has attacked her. This is for her and for You and Your kingdom. In Jesus's name, Who healed a bunch of people during His earthly ministry...and by the work of the Holy Spirit, Who heals today~~Amen.

Daughters Serving the Lord

• Amy: First day as "Graduate Assistant for Women's Programming" at Taylor University.  Please, Lord, let her ... what? ... "succeed" according to Your will, make disciples of the women students, feel Your presence in her work.
• Julie: Last week at Lakeside Christian Camp.  Please, Lord, let her also succeed according to Your will, make disciples of the campers with whom she has worked, and feel Your presence in her work.

All in Jesus's name!  Amen.

Moment

Lord, it is a Thursday night.  Right now, Julie's at Lakeside, Amy's at Samantha's, and George is...who knows?  Dear Lord, I am not very focused right now.  If I were to sit quietly for a bit of time, I know that I would think of several if not a dozen things to bring to You.

90 seconds from home!  That's George.  Later, Lord.  Love you!

Sydney Allen

Oh, God!  How tragic this event that took a 3-year-old baby girl's life!  1 Thessalonians 4:13 says,

Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.

May we not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.  May we, and especially the Allens, grieve with the comfort that comes only from You.  Supernatural, extraordinary comfort that is next to impossible for the human mind to comprehend but which our regenerate hearts can glimpse.

Wishing for a Long Time

Lord, it's just before 10 a.m. today, and I will have to get to work on time for 11:30 a.m.  :(  In between, I need to package some things for Julie and send out a quick invitation to the MOPS gals for Sunday.  I am still dripping wet from my shower!  Thank You that You are master of time, and the number of minutes I spend here is not indicative of my prayer or of Your love.

So--Do I have a blind spot when it comes to that patient at work?  I seem to butt heads with the psychiatrist over him.  He is a pain; that is not the issue.  In fact, in general it seems that we are ("we" meaning the professional staff) failing to treat most of our patients with dignity and respect.  However, I digress.  My initial question concerned a blind spot.  If I have one, dear Lord, reveal it to me and open my eyes.  This stalemate, this conflict is not comfortable (although my comfort is not the goal here).

Please bless both my daughters, but especially Julie this week at Lakeside.  Please give her extra wisdom, maturity, patience, love, and endurance.  Show her a glimpse of Yourself?  That will keep her going!  She's a special one.  May she bless You right back.

I wish I didn't have to go.  I have SO much more to pray about.  Accept this small entry as a token of my praying without ceasing, but having no evidence to support that.  :)  I love You!  Amen.

In the "Garden"

That may not be the best title for this post, Lord, but it reflects my wish to spend time in the quiet place in my heart--Your garden--with You.

Today's One Year Bible reading is Paul's testimony to ... Jerusalem?  In this part of the story, he speaks Greek to the commander of the barracks and Aramaic to the crowd.  This made me think of Franklin, and his interest in languages for the purpose of translating Scripture for those who have no version for themselves.  Please bless that young man, Lord, and preserve his life and health for the furtherance of Your Kingdom.

One part of the passage that I wondered about was this: "The God of our fathers has chosen you to know his will and to see the Righteous One and to hear words from his mouth."  Would this mean me, too?  "You will be his witness to all men of what you have seen and heard.  And now what are you waiting for?"  This fits well with the premise of David Platt's book Follow Me, that our only purpose and Your overriding will is to tell all people the message.

Oh, to spend more time here with You.  It's almost 9 a.m., and I have to mail that Keurig K-cup holder today, and I haven't showered yet, and I have to be at work by 11:30 a.m.  For a day alone....

Love You, dear Lord!

PS  Blessings on Julie!  She is probably exhausted in her work at Lakeside.

Thoughts from Follow Me

Hi, Lord.  I took a sick day from work today, and in truth I feel a little off.  Despite that, I accomplished a great deal today, not the least of which is making this entry.

David Platt's premise in Follow Me is a very powerful argument: that our only and most important calling in life is to follow Christ "radically" (related to the title of his other book).  Nothing else matters.  That does not, paradoxically, mean that we become spartan or that we quit our jobs to "minister" full time.  It does mean that everything is subjected to the ultimate purpose of evangelizing.

So, here I am.  I am about to make cupcakes for Amy's friend Samantha's bridal shower on Saturday. Of course, it is about 80 degrees in the house.  :)  Sacrifice!!  Love you, Lord, and may You be glorified by me at the shower, at work, everywhere!

One Thousand Dollars

Oh, my goodness, Lord.  I wish my husband had been more understanding about our daughter's desire (call?) to return to Mexico for a week of celebration for all the ones whom she has grown to love.  However, he did it.  We are contributing half of the above amount to make this trip happen.  Please bless this step of faith and obedience.  How does one ever really know what You are calling her to do?  Paul--you, the after-apostle--you seemed to know even when it didn't make "sense."  Lord, please confirm this in some way.  We are not very experienced at this following thing, certainly not as much as our years of living with You might suggest.  And bless her trip, her friends, and most of all, her.  In Jesus's name and by Your Spirit~~Amen.

Praying Julie Home

Ahh, Lord!  The weather for flying is terrible.  Please help.  I started to try to specify how I want You to help, but I believe You already know what to do.  Please bring all those young people to the ground safely and return them all to their families.  I beg You to be gracious and redirect the storms OR the flight to ensure their safety.  Please.  In Jesus's name~Amen

For Junior Church

The weight of responsibility for Junior Church is sometimes heavy, dear Lord.  Please touch some people's hearts to help this Sunday.  I need to put together the June schedule, but we have to get this Sunday set immediately.  I'm pleading.  I'm not just asking.  This is for You and Your work in the lives of these precious children.  In a minute or two, I will send out another email.  Would You bless it with fruit?  In Your wonderful name, so worth sharing~~Amen and amen.

Julie in Montana

Lord, I checked the weather forecast for Ashland, MT, and it looks like thunderstorms today and rain until Friday.  :(  And the team is camping.  I remember a "camping" trip with Crossroads many (many) years ago that was wet and miserable, and You impressed James 1 onto my heart:

Consider it all joy, my brethren (and sisters), when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.  And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.  (verses 2-4)

Well worth memorizing for myself, and  I will also pray this for the GO West team.  Please guard Julie's heart from any bitterness over the bad weather, and shine Your Spirit through her joy.  This is an amazing adventure that she is on!  Open the eyes of her heart, Lord.  She wants to see You.  Please grant that desire of her heart.

And from my mother-heart, please bring her home safely and well.  I am really looking forward to the trip home with her (although I suspect she will sleep some or most of the drive).

Holy Spirit, I ask You for special work in Julie's life during these last few days of this ministry.  Do Your thing.  You know that I am asking this for Julie's sake, of course, and also for the sake of the spread of the Kingdom--Your Kingdom--through Jesus Christ and for the glory of God.  Amen!!

Julie GO'd West

Father God, I have been holding Julie in my thoughts since she left a week ago for Colorado on the Global Outreach (GO) trip to the West.  I haven't had as much time to write, though.  Please accept this prayer for her retrospectively and prospectively.  The messages that the team members are posting on the information line seem positive and even fun!  I ask for her a chance to share You with the others, a glimpse of Your call on her life, and an experience that will stay in her memory as a wonderful time.  Please keep all of them from sickness and exhaustion.  Refresh their bodies as they camp even as You refresh their spirits every day.  I can hardly wait until I can hear all her stories, told in her funny, pithy way.  Guard her closely and protect her from every evil.  In Jesus's name and in the leading of the Holy Spirit, for the sake of Your kingdom in Julie's life and through her as well~~Amen.



My Alone Time

God, I know my time is extremely limited this afternoon.  Without going into all the details of the tasks awaiting me, please allow me to spend this completely necessary time alone with You to refresh.  I am uncomfortable even doing this at home.  Interested "nosy" eyes look at what I am writing, and sometimes this is intensely personal stuff.

And that is, after all, what prayer is supposed to be.  As I sit here and think about that statement--"what prayer is supposed to be"-- I also recall that prayer is supposed to be a time of devoting myself to You, to adoring You, to appreciating You.  You really have been amazing (more so than normal, which is amazing) throughout our trip to pick up Amy in Tijuana.  I, on the other hand, have not been so amazing.  Man, has my sin appeared.  I leap to justifying my behaviors, of course; after all, I am a normal human in that regard.  I don't think I can even begin to acknowledge the specifics; I still have an emotional reaction to the situations.  I will surrender, God.  I am an inappropriate, imperfect, sinful woman, and I have quick and judgmental reactions to people.  I need much more "tolerance" (though I hate that word) for people who are less than perfect, too.  (My DH falls into that category, of course.)

So, over the past month I have been...lonely.  There are not very many, if any, people to whom I can talk openly and without fear of judgment.  I have retreated into my relationship with You even more.  I don't think that's all that great.  Not that it isn't wonderful to tell You everything, and hopefully to listen to You and learn.  I run the risk of becoming "right in my own eyes" but not in the views of others.  And then, to complicate matters even further, I run the risks (plural) of measuring my success by others' opinions of me OR of not caring to verify my truths with others.  Oy.  My head begins to hurt.

Ideally, God, I would be in such close communication with You that only Your approval and direction would matter to me.  Would You allow that for me?  I'd really like it.

Oh, for more time!  In Jesus's name and in the fullness of the Holy Spirit~Amen.

For My Babies

Lord, I am rushing.  Sweetly and simply, may they (my daughters) both finish strong.  Julie: clear mind through exhaustion.  Amy: grace and love through sorrow over leaving La Casa.  In Jesus's name and in the power of the Holy Spirit, Amen~

Daughters

Amy: THROWING UP!  Tijuana version of Montezuma's Revenge?  We face-timed after her message about the vomiting; so, I know that she is all right, if a little dizzy/queasy.  Dear Father, this last week of her time there is precious--and emotionally weird.  It sounds like she has learned a lot, some of which she may not have wanted to learn.  Help her to integrate these lessons into her life and into herself in a way which testifies to Your love and makes her a better minister of the Gospel.  And...let's bring her home safely!

Julie: GO retreat this weekend, final classes next week, and some final exams before May 10th.  I'm tired just typing this.  Dear Father, bless her with efficiency and a wonderful closeness to You such that she knows as she has never known before the filling and power of the Holy Spirit.  Thank You for her ministry in a more secular environment.  Please give her opportunities to share not only her "faith" but You Yourself.  Be glorified~

~in both my daughters' lives and in my own as well.  What gifts, what blessings they are to me!  I am so eager to be with them over the San Diego trip.  Please make our time together sweet fellowship.

And PS, a selfish request: and I will understand if You say no: Could we get that 2-bedroom condo while we are there?  (In the face of the poverty that both girls have been and will be witnessing, this is a strange thing to ask, I know... )

Sophomore Year Finals

Dear Gracious and Omniscient Father God--yeah, I sound like Eugene Meltsner or Spencer Reid, don't I?--please bless my daughter Julie during these last days of her sophomore year.  She is sending me a 15-page research paper to review tonight, and then she goes into finals week.  Give her rest, even if she shorts herself on sleep.  Please make her studying very efficient, her retention of the material almost "anal" (haha), and her ability to recount what she has learned effective and persuasive on papers and finals.  I am excited to have her coming with us to get Amy from the orphanage!  I can't pray here for much longer since I am at work, but I did want to get this off my mind and into Your heart (although I really do know I can do that without writing it.)  In Jesus's name~~Amen.

For Julie

Julie's my more silent daughter, Lord.  :)  Please bless her during these last 2-3 weeks of school with clear thinking, learning, efficiency, faithfulness, and joy.  I trust that You are pursuing her (not that she is running away from you) since the cares of this world can interfere with anyone's relationship with you.

Miguelito's Eye

Father, please bless the surgeons who are operating on Miguelito's lazy eye.  Give them steadiness, focus, extra skill, and extra grace.  Please touch Miguelito's little heart as well as his little body with Your loving and healing hands.  Fill Amy with such grace and love and wisdom that it effortlessly pours from her all over him.  May he be blanketed with peace as You heal him, and I ask a special guard against anything that could interfere with or interrupt this wonderful work that is being done--that You are doing--for him.  In Jesus's name and by the healing work of the Holy Spirit in this age~~Amen.

Daughter's Medical Ignorance

Dear Heavenly Father, You are the Great Physician, and my oldest daughter is so ignorant.  Please protect her from her lack of knowledge about medications and restore her from having taken the Naproxen, an NSAID, when she is "allergic" to that category of drugs.  I want to wake her up way out in Tijuana, but it is only 6:20 a.m. there and I would imagine that she is sound asleep, perhaps even more because she is sick.  This is incredibly hard for me as Mama, You know.  My heart races to reach her and educate her and get her to an epi-pen!! Or at least Benadryl or some other antihistamine.  But here I sit, Lord, forcing myself to pray.  Please...please protect her and heal her.  This is one act of faith on my part.  You graciously indulged my anxiety last night by having her respond to me.  Now, please, wake her up just enough to respond again, if I may be so bold--actually, so weak--to ask.

I know...I get a little bit annoyed with all the people who pray for medical problems and healing.  This is hypocritical of me.  Forgive my two-faced hypocrisy, I ask, since You, too, have the heart of a parent and understand the desire to keep Your children from harm--even if the harm is brought on by their own stupidity.  In fact, maybe especially because of their own stupidity!

Lord, there is so little time to pray.  I would do this for hours--pray, that is.  But I have responsibilities and I must attend to the rapid passage of time.  Please make time for our praying soon?  I love You, and I trust that You love my daughter and will keep her in Your hands until her body can get rid of the medicine.  In the power of the Holy Trinity who love and serve each other~~Amen.

Bold Speech

Luke 11:37 Jesus Criticizes the Religious Leaders

Oh, my goodness, Lord!

Luke 12:1 A Warning Against Hypocrisy

Double-oh, my goodness, Lord!!

This is a minefield for me.  I am quick to criticize "religious leaders," and then I do find myself wondering at my own hypocrisy.  Please work in my heart to see as You see, to hold everything including myself up to Your high standards, but not to judge.  That responsibility belongs to You alone.  Just because others do not see things as I see them does not (necessarily) mean that they are wrong.  That is the normal way of interpreting the world, though.  How does one know when one is right?  Holy Spirit, You need to lead me into all truth, and that must include the truth about being right--and wrong.  I will listen, though I know it will take practice and humility.  I don't have enough of either.  In Jesus's name, for the sake of the kingdom of God, and by the tutelage of the Holy Spirit I pray~~Amen.

Two Months!

My last post here, Lord, was almost two months ago!!  Yikes.  No excuses, since You know everything already.  :)  What do busy people do for prayer time?  I really dislike the pace that prohibits a lengthy, or lengthier, time of prayer.  (And just now, I had to run to the bathroom.)  I wonder...whether the Devil interferes with times of prayer on purpose.  It would make sense that he would want to interrupt communications between You, our commander, and us, your soldiers.

I don't have very much time even now, because I have a podiatry appointment within the hour (plus 4 minutes, according to the computer clock).  One quick prayer: MOPS Ladies' Night at our house on Friday.  Please bless it all.  I need to prepare, clean, and "mentor."  Dearest Lord, this is all for You and the spiritual growth of these young women.  I am Your handmaiden, maidservant, and obedient daughter.  Thank You for all of those privileges.  In Jesus's name and by the indwelling Holy Spirit's power and guidance~~Amen.

Random Prayer Promises

• David Huillca: trabajo!
• Kassidy Jones: application to Monty Tech

My Sick Baby Girl

Dear Father God, I need to pray quickly because my time is running out on this Ash Wednesday.  My baby (age 20, but still....) is sick.  She has flu, strep, ear infection, and now apparent conjunctivitis.  Please heal her.  Bring her rest and relief from her discomfort and pain.  (On a side selfish note, it is nice to have her home.)  Restore her to life and ministry for her sake and, more importantly, for Your sake.  In Jesus's powerful healing name~~Amen!

Just to Be With You

Good morning, dear sweet Lord.  It's a grey, foggy day today.  However, it is still "the day the Lord has made" and I will rejoice and be glad in it.  (Psalm 118:24)

I often try to have a topic of some sort to talk over with You.  Today, there is either too much--or nothing, depending on how I look at it.  I could not even begin to sort through the myriad points on my prayer list; there are so many.  Many of them are dear people in my life, and some are situations or issues that I would really love to discuss with You.  But I feel bogged down.  Bogged down by the "list," I think, as if it is important to check off each item when it is done.

I don't think that's what prayer is supposed to be.  Is it?  I try to get into the skin of the great heroes of the Bible and (impossibly) into Jesus's own heart and imagine their prayer lives.  Did they have lists?  I can imagine Jesus praying for each of his disciples when there were only a few of them, but when there were thousands, did He spend all that time talking about each one of them with You?  I suspect not in the way that we often "pray" for people.  Hospitalizations, illnesses, marriages and divorces, wayward children, cars and money and jobs...

The pastor in Iran, Saeed Abidini, who was recently convicted and sentenced to 8 years imprisonment, most definitely warrants prayer, though.  Last night I was drifting off to sleep and was praying for him.  What was I praying?  I wasn't sure what was most aligned with Your will, although from a human and compassionate place I asked (and still do, by the way) that You might spare him this almost certain persecution and suffering.  Then I wondered whether Your way of praying would focus on strengthening him and shielding his heart and spirit from the attack of evil as he passes through these very deep and dark times.  In either case, or both, dear Heavenly Father, please accept my prayer joined with many others, I hope, for my unknown brother.

My children at Heritage...what a powerful letter from Kim Russo about Sara and Sam!  To You be all the glory!!

My biological daughters, one being a "mother" in Tijuana and one being a student and volunteer in the Bronx...would You encourage them today and guard their hearts, minds, souls, and very lives in places that my mother's heart finds dangerous.

My own mother, recently widowed and living relatively successfully with macular degeneration: she had dental work on Monday, and may I pray that she is recovering with minimal pain?

My mother-in-law, who frustrates me many times, who is living much more unsuccessfully with macular degeneration (from 20/60 to 20/400): soften my heart and hers, please.

My dear husband, faithful in every way (but dieting, but even for this period of time he is "counting points"): What can I say?  He is a true gift.  He needs a sharp, quick mind in his job, and he grows tired.  Fuel him, please?

See what I mean?  The list has so many items on it.  I think I might rather just sit, or kneel (for as long as I could), with You and feel Your eyes looking into mine and only by the grace of Jesus have the boldness to look back into Your eyes, and melt.  Boldness not from myself, I emphasize, but boldness and confidence because of the blood of Christ all over me:

Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus (Hebrews 10:19)
 

 So, dear God, time's a-wastin'.  I am blessed to have a job that in most ways and at most times I really love.  Make my remaining time this morning exceptionally efficient, please, to bring glory to You.  In Jesus's name, in the power of the Holy Spirit, and for the sake of the Gospel and the Kingdom~~~Amen

Maestra and "El Arbol Generoso"

Dearest Holy God, my "Mexicana" daughter is concerned about the woman co-director of the orphanage.  As she describes Maestra, I see a frustrated, angry woman whose life has not turned out the way she had hoped.  Is this vision from You?  She has become a Giving Tree (Shel Silverstein) who might not be a willing one....

Maestra, as my daughter sees, is harsh, punitive, and sometimes even violent in her discipline of the ninos.  At one time, my daughter reported that the Mexican style of discipline is largely harsh, and the poor residents of the orphanage cannot expect any softness or affection in life anyway; so, almost to prepare them for a hard life, there is little in the way of love.


Is that what happened to Maestra, Lord?  Was her childhood difficult?  She married Profe many years ago, and perhaps she expected a more middle-class life since they are both educators.  Now...52 children at this time, and more have been there at other times.

Father, soften her heart.  I suspect that she has not really experienced Your gracious and forgiving love.  Please remove the veil from her eyes and her heart to see how gently and still firmly You discipline, and to what end--repentance and restoration of relationship!  May this become true for her and then through her may this become true for the ninos.  In Jesus's name~~Amen.

Mary Ann

Oh, dear God, Mary Ann is also a cause for concern.  Her vision is dramatically worse, and she was dizzy and vomiting earlier this week.  Of even greater concern is her distortion of the Gospel.  Please, dear Lord, touch her body and especially her soul and spirit with divine healing.

What we didn't know...current smoking increases the risk of AMD 6.6-fold.  Past smoking, 20 years before the exam/AMD, shows no increased risk.  Former smoking increases risk 3.2-fold.  Oh, Lord.  Even if she quit now, it won't help without your blessing.

Please, God, strengthen Dan and especially Kimberly.  They have been amazingly supportive of Mary Ann, almost to the point of being the only, exclusive supports--not to put down Kim Marie's and Beth's loving attentions when possible.  These are hard times for Mary Ann, and by their close proximity and relationship, for Kimberly and Dan, too.  Guide them to the right doctors; give everyone (and most importantly Mary Ann) wisdom to choose the correct course of action and treatment; and soften Mary Ann's heart toward You.  I hope that she won't become hardened or bitter toward You because of this difficult blow.

Donna and Tom

Aww, come on, Lord.  I don't mean to be disrespectful.  Why did Tom have to lose this job?  It appears from Donna's account that it was a change of ownership and no fault of Tom's.  And Maine won't pay him unemployment benefits because he collected from another state within the past 12 months?  This really doesn't help Donna's anxiety.

And there is an intervention.  Please give me a verse to send to her.  What should it be?

There's Philippians 4:6-7 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
 

And there's 1 Peter 5:7, my older daughter's favorite verse

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
 

Father God, You are the giver of all good gifts.  Here we have Tom, a man who is motivated to provide for his family--both his wife and daughter AND his elderly father.  Please honor his heart and lead him to the job that You have already known.  In the meantime, please help Donna to trust You. Show them both, or perhaps more accurately, make it exceptionally obvious to them that You love them and have their needs close to Your heart.  Give them peace, and provision, and grow their faith--Tom's especially, but also Donna's as a way to reduce her anxiety.   I promised Donna I would pray right now, and so I am.  I ask in Jesus's name and for His sake in their lives and in the world~Amen.

Holy Spirit

Dearest God, I have been a bit stuck in composing the annual report for Junior Church.  Please inspire me.  There have been so many crazy and new situations this year that have frustrated and annoyed and stretched me.  I do not wish to quench the Holy Spirit, and I definitely want the Holy Spirit to empower my life and my (measly) work for You.

Hurry!

Lord, my husband is in the shower, we are taking the tree down today, my mother is coming over...help!

• Wanda's eyes: restoration?
• Julie at FCRH: "success"
• Amy at Casa: ministry with love
• George: healing from this flu

...and many other things.  Have to run now.  Love you so much!

Convicted But Not Condemned

Dearest God, You know what this is about.  Thank You for pointing out my sin, and thank You even more that You no longer condemn me for it.  Give me what I need--more of Your Spirit--to keep me from falling into this sin again (and again...).

Wanda's Eyes

Please, dear God, have mercy on Wanda and preserve or even restore her vision.

Flu

Dear Great Physician, my husband is sick.  Even though he may exaggerate his sickness, the reality is that he has a flu, and it is not fun.  Please allow me to be more supportive and compassionate.  Please also strengthen him and heal him quickly.  He would not do well with a chronic illness!  May this illness soften his heart toward those who struggle with illness on a daily basis and find that Your strength is made perfect in weakness.  May he learn not to judge those who become ill as if the illness was their fault or a result of poor choices on their parts.  And thank You once again for the blessing of being able to "pray" through this blog/journal in private.  It does help me to focus and to really talk to You.

On that note, I think I will try to get to bed by 10 p.m. tonight, to ward off flu for myself.  We are vey fortunate to have such good health care, Lord.  Let me (especially) not forget that You really are the ultimate Great Physician.  In Jesus's name and in the Holy Spirit's power~Amen!

More Exciting than a Date!

Dearest God, I mean that.  Ever since I realized that I could take advantage of some time here on this prayer-journal, I have been excited.  Oh, how my soul needs this resting time in Your presence!  And how the world around me needs You, hopefully called upon through my intercessory prayers.

• Jenny: She deserves, and may get, a post of her own.  Dear God, what is going on with her?  And her mother?  Please prevent me from any judgmental condemnations or quick prescriptions.  I totally believe that Jenny is a complex and intricate young woman who may have challenges that I cannot comprehend, or maybe do not comprehend because I don't know all the details.  In any case, would You please bless her?  Show her how much You love and accept her.  I do believe that she has an attachment disorder, as I believe other professionals who have evaluated her also think.  Her mother, Kim Marie, is poorly equipped emotionally and "informationally" to handle Jenny's unique personality.  Please intervene in both lives to bring peace and love---peace to their family and true, deep, unconditional love between them.  Give Cliff and Kim Marie more than enough wisdom to navigate through these difficult days.  Please prevent them from being too harsh on Jenny, which will only reinforce her attachment reluctance.  Most of all, please shout into Jenny's heart Your deep, accepting love for her.
• My mother, Wanda: As she navigates this second holiday since Bill's death, please comfort her.  My girls have been SO good with her!  (Thank You for them.)  Turn her toward Yourself for companionship when she feels lonely and when those who do love her have other obligations that prevent them/us from spending as much time with her as ... well, as she might want and as we might want but cannot.  Give her some purpose, some joy, some reason to keep on.
• Me!  I just drifted over to FB to see whether anyone particular came to mind for more intercession.  Paradoxically, I came to my own mind.  :)  I am tired.  Much to do today--but You are my strength!
• Amy: that resistant dry socket.  Please, dear Great Physician, touch that place in her mouth and cause it first to stop hurting and secondly to heal.
• The Haydens: They are going through the losing process with Lorraine, and it is never easy.  Please, Father, lead them, energize them, strengthen them for challenging days ahead, and give them some rest.  This request may also be reflected in the Jenny item above.  Jenny may need more attention than Daddy in particular has time or energy to give right now.  Please comfort the entire Hayden family, including the extended relatives, and give them moments of connecting with Lorraine and even Clayton as they await what seems to be inevitable--her death.

I have only 3 minutes left.  I will need to get off in a hurry so I don't lose this post.  Love You!!!!

Julie's Final in Science

Heavenly Father, please do what You do to help people in my Julie's life.  This is her last final for the semester--her only final for the semester!--and the last possible time slot.  Help her to place her confidence in You and in the blessing that You pour out on Your faithful ones.  Calm her, help her not only to recall  everything she has learned but also to be able to deduce and induce things -- inspire her.  May she finish strong and enjoy her evening with her sister and her cousin (Kayleen).  In Jesus's name and in Your Spirit~Amen.

Julie's Finals

Please, Heavenly Father, bless Julie during this last week of her college semester.  Make her papers clear and meaningful.  Help her to get enough sleep, particularly by making her studying efficient.  Give her confidence not only in her own abilities, but most importantly in Your great omniscience.  Bring them all home safely!  In Jesus's name~~Amen.

Newtown

Oh, dearest God, "there are no words" is the most frequent thing I have seen on Facebook, and I would have to agree.  There aren't.  How could this unthinkable tragedy happen?  Just 11 days away from the birthday of Your Son, a holiday that is so closely associated with childhood, and 20 children will...well, they will be celebrating with You in heaven, but their parents will be crying.  Comfort these dear people, God.  Please.  As a Father who had His Son killed, You of all people understand the grief.  The heartwrenching, heartbreaking grief. 

There are no words.  So, Holy Spirit, You intercede for us all in this terrible tragedy.  There are no words! 

Taylor MAHE

Dearest God, whom we serve out of love, please direct Amy's experiences at Taylor today.  Please also lead her in the path in which she should go.  In Jesus's name~Amen!

Laura's Daughter #3

For Paige, Lord...details later.

Membership?? Maybe Not

...or, dear God, maybe so, if You so direct.  I don't want to go into prayer with my mind already made up.

Please show us what You want us to do.  I know that I have many reservations about HBC that are coloring my opinion.  I certainly don't feel that I can join my life to this church with as many concerns as I have.

• Started from a split
• The parade of elders and deacons who have stepped down, with no explanation
• The very first comment that "Women do not participate" - nothing to clarify that statement
• The NANC focus (as with many things, this is not black or white)
• The Ezzo class (as above)
• The 5-point Calvinism divide
• The early emphasis on "spank first, ask later"
• The hurtful email about my "frustrating" (or some synonymous word) someone
• The Master's Christian Academy fiasco
• Ignoring Amy's and Julie's missions trips
• Ignoring the older children's needs for teaching
• ...and more, but not right now.

(Right now, dear Father, I'm going to get something to eat and then go find Amy in recovery!)

PS  For earlier indications of my discomfort with membership and this church, see my post of 9/27/2010.  Over two years ago!

Worship!

Good morning, Lord.  Here I am on a Sunday morning at home.  I have only a cold, but it is Christmas season (Happy Earth-Birthday!) and giving a virus to children and/or their parents is not my idea of a gift!

I have looked forward to this time for maybe two weeks or more now.  Having gone back to work (thank You for the job), I don't have as much time as I did during my recovery, and even then I did not have much time because of Bill's deterioration and death.

So..."Here I Am to Worship."  I wanted to choose a worship song to make this "service" complete.  I think You brought that one to mind.  (The video I wanted to include was Tim Hughes's, with scenes from The Passion of the Christ.  However, it wasn't a YouTube video, which seems to be permitted here.)  Tears streaming down my face....

Prayer: The Nicols 5 asked us to pray for Jeremiah, who has strep throat and an ear infection and is now at Disney World with them.  Please, dear Father, in your healing way touch that boy's body and allow the entire family to have an amazing time of family bonding.

Scripture: From the Advent calendar-December 9th, Isaiah 42:1-4

“Look at my servant, whom I strengthen.
He is my chosen one, who pleases me.
I have put my Spirit upon him.
He will bring justice to the nations.
² He will not shout
or raise his voice in public.
³ He will not crush the weakest reed
or put out a flickering candle.
He will bring justice to all who have been wronged.
⁴ He will not falter or lose heart
until justice prevails throughout the earth.
Even distant lands beyond the sea will wait for his instruction.^[a]”

 

(Footnotes: Isaiah 42:4 Greek version reads And his name will be the hope of all the world. Compare Matt 12:21.)

How does this prophecy further clarify what the Messiah will accomplish? He will bring justice to the nations; He will not crush the weakest reed or put out a flickering candle (which I think means that He will preserve and protect even the weakest person with even a tiny amount of faith); again, He will bring justice, and He will not stop or become discouraged (as I sometimes do) until justice prevails! 
How does the Messiah’s activity in these verses reflect the character of God?  This one is easy to answer.  God is just and desires justice.  He also pursues justice gently (not shouting or raising His voice, and watching out for the weak and "flickering"). 

Dear God, it's almost 10:45 a.m. and I would like to use this time wisely.  That is not to say that being here with you is not using time in the wisest possible way.  :)  Make me efficient today, please.  I do love you with all my heart.

Wisdom (Teeth) for Amy

Dearest Heavenly Father, today I am at St. Vincent’s Hospital with my daughter (our daughter—George’s and mine, and Yours and ours) Amy to have her wisdom teeth extracted.  Most times, it is not necessary to be in a hospital setting for this procedure, but her cutaneous mastocytosis scares people.  I am grateful for caution!  So, this is what I am asking: Please protect her from any reactions AND allow her recovery to be smooth, uncomplicated, and as painless as possible.  (We expect a little pain, but since she cannot take some of the pain relievers such as ibuprofen and morphine-related drugs, I especially ask for Your supernatural intervention to treat her pain.)

She has done well so far, dear Lord.  She is so beautiful, inside and out.  It seems to this proud mother that people just gravitate toward her lovely spirit.  The doctors: Peter Drob, DMD, and Neeru Oberoi, MD for anesthesiology.  The nurses: Ann Marie in the prep area (whose Catholic school teachers at Benedictine told her she’d never amount to anything—terrible), Ellen for the first anesthesia nurse, James the attending anesthesia nurse, and the other nurse who will be 38 on December 23^rd.  It seemed like a good team!  Please cover them all with blessing and grace, especially since they will be taking care of our daughter.

God, please also lead Amy in the path in which she should go.  She will need to reapply at Taylor for the MAHE program, IF that’s what You are calling her to do next year.  Oh, the parting from Casa is going to be painful.  She is already talking about going back on vacations.  Between working, paying back loans, saving for plane fare, rent, car expenses—well, Lord, we know that if returning to Tijuana is Your will, You will provide.

It’s only 8:21 a.m.  I’ll go upstairs around 8:50 to wait for the report.

Father, thank You that You care at least as much as I do for this young lady whom You have given me.  You have more power than I do to keep her safe.  You also understand my mother-heart and its desire to shield her from pain and suffering.  (Gives me pause to realize that You essentially violated that natural wish to save Your own Son in order to save me.  Wow.)  Please let this be an uncomplicated course at least in part so that Amy can return to Mexico to love those ninos for Your sake.  In Jesus’s name~Amen!

9:42 a.m.  Waiting in the Family Waiting Room; no news yet.  Getting a little bit anxious.  My mother/Amy's grandmother called already asking for an update.  Dear Lord, please let the delay be benign.  Please....

Ahhhh

9:42 a.m. at Worcester Public Library

I needed this time, dearest God.  I have looked forward to spending some time with You, alone, in secret for days now.  I love having my daughters and my husband at home with me, even though I feel protective of our time together and don't feel comfortable "praying" with them around.

So, here I am.  My eyes have overflowed--leaked, as the girls would say--at least two times this morning with grief over Bill.  I cannot imagine how Wanda feels.  I think it will be a hard time adjusting to her widowhood, not only for her but for all of us who support and love her.  We all will need extra grace from You for the task.  I'm really glad Amy will be home until after Christmas, although she will have her own recovery from oral surgery for part of that time.  She is a good companion for Wanda, as is Julie, who will be home from mid-December to mid-January.

I go back to work on Monday next.

I'm overwhelmed thinking about Christmas.

I have a lot to think about with Junior Church, and I desperately need Your intervention.

It takes a lot of work to love people.

I just want to sit with You in silence and be in Your presence.

Just as the body is dead without breath, so also faith is dead without good works. (James 2)

I just sent Debbie a message apologizing for omitting her grandson from the list of Bill's great-grandchildren.

I have only 6 minutes left.  Lord God, I am learning to walk one step at a time with You.  I always think, and have always thought, that there is something else that I "should" be doing to serve You.  (You know I don't like the word "should.")  Sometimes now I realize that I am doing what I can and that I need to do that faithfully.  Be glorified in my life, dearest God.  In Jesus's name~~Amen.

"Who Do You Want Me to Love for You Today?"

~Esther Ahn Kim, Christian in prison 1939-1945

Holy God, my mind is skittish today.  It is the day after Bill's funeral, and life is not yet back to normal.  I have probably 6 things already clamoring for top priority on my mental to-do list.  I chose to read (or finish?) a chapter in Forgotten God to start.  That's where I encountered the quote that I made the title for today's entry.

So!  Back to a new reality--an oxymoron, really.  Dear God, as I navigate this next 10 days before I return to work, help me please to focus on the really important priorities.  We have Thanksgiving coming up in less than a week, and my mother is characteristically choosing to host it at her house despite her recent loss of Bill.  That will mean a fair amount of cooking and transporting for me, but I can do all things [that You call me to do] through Christ.

Please, Lord, as I make my reading way through Forgotten God, allow me to practice living by the Spirit in a way that I have never done before now.  (Detour: controversy about the uncertain "gender" of the Holy Spirit)  As a mother, I understand more deeply than ever before the uncanny connection that I have with my daughters, a connection that their father almost envies.  May the Holy Spirit and I have that connection and more.  There is an almost intuitive understanding, a resonance, that I sometimes glimpse with my girls and that I desire even more fully with the Holy Spirit.  So particularly today, as I try to make my way through my list of tasks, could the Holy Spirit direct me?  (Of course!)  More properly, could I be allowed to see and feel the Holy Spirit's direction?  You know that I pray this as Scripture teaches, in Jesus's name~~Amen.

Election

Dear God, all-knowing and all-powerful, my husband said last night that he was experiencing anxiety over this election.  This is a pivotal time in the life of our nation and our world, to be sure.  Is there much doubt, if any, that the day of Your return is imminent?  The signs multiply and occur more rapidly than ever before. 

The leadership of this country is not Godly, if I may share my opinion openly here without fear of offending someone.  Perhaps that is a necessary condition for repentance and for Your coming!  However, dear Lord God, there are many souls yet to be saved.  Would You allow a miracle and put into the presidency a man who (at least) acknowledges You and has served You?  My opinions intrude here...may Your will be done, and may we Americans take seriously the responsibility that we have to work with You in accomplishing Your great will for salvation for the world.

I'm going to vote now.  Bless this day, bless the candidates, and please, may Your chosen man be chosen by this wayward, selfish people.

Promised Prayer for NJ

 

Dear Father in Heaven, I did promise my New Jersey relatives that I would pray for them and for their neighbors affected by Hurricane Sandy.  So many are without power and heat and fuel.  Some are without homes.  It is natural, but not right, to blame You for the tragedy.  We--myself included, unfortunately--do not pay attention to You, and then we feel entitled to Your blessing.  But enough pontificating for now; the people in NJ are suffering, and many of them may not have heard the truth about You.  Please relieve their suffering and at the same time please do it in a way that reveals You to them.  Just relieving their problems and allowing them to go back to lives that ignore You is not my prayer.  Thank You for those of my family who have some awareness of You!  Please magnify that awareness into a personal confrontation and conversation with You, and may they find you as attractive as You are.  I pray this, dear God, for Jesus's sake in this world and in the next~~Amen!

Closer Attention

First, Lord, confession. I feel mysteriously inhibited when my husband is at home! I would "normally" do a number of things, some frivolous and some quite serious, with my time that I somehow and for some reason am unable to do when he is around. ??? What is that all about?


One of the things that I cannot do, but I think I have talked this over with You before, is write here.  For me, this is important.  (I don't want to contemplate what I would do if I could not write.)  This journal is a way for me to harness my prayers and to make a record of them.  I do thank You for providing this venue.  I suppose that You will be as gracious as always if this discipline of writing is removed from my life.  I won't think about that right now, though.  Just thanks.

Hebrews 2 today: Pay closer attention!  Always.  "...lest we drift away from it."  If we are not rowing against the current (of society, of our own sin, and/or of Satan), we will drift backwards.  Pay closer attention!  Much closer attention.

     I'm not sure where this takes me.  "Attention to what we have heard" includes some poor theology or poor Christian practice, too, I suppose.  I do NOT want to focus there, though.  I think it was our former pastor, Dan Curtis, who opined that we really need to focus thoroughly on the truth and the Truth, and the distortions and falsehoods will become evident.  So, let me focus on the truth.

I have mentioned this elsewhere: The Holy Spirit, the "Forgotten God" (as coined by Francis Chan).  I read last night that there may be some evidence that the Holy Spirit could be considered feminine!  This thought makes me smile.  I won't make a controversy of it, and I will probably keep it to myself, but it apparently has Biblical back-up in the original languages.  It makes sense.  So much of what we women do and are seems to be embodied in the person and work of the Holy Spirit.  :)

Lord God, my time is so limited.  There is a grocery-list of people and situations to pray about.  For right now, I want my time to be devoted just to You.  We'll do the intercession later.  You are amazing, God.  In Jesus's name~Amen.

PS  Thank You that I did NOT need a dental crown today!

Just Relating to You

I am liking Francis Chan's book Forgotten God. I'm not sure I understand it well yet, though. Please help me to get to know You better!  Amen.

One of My Boys

Father, I promised Holland that he could count on my praying for him.  He particularly asked for wisdom in managing his (rather meager) salary.  Please provide for him in so many other ways that the cash does not seem paltry to him.  Give him richness of experience and lots of time to study for LSATs if that is what You are calling him to pursue.  He sometimes befuddles me, dear Lord, but he is a good young man.  Call him into a much deeper relationship with You.  I am quite confident that of all the requests in this prayer, that one is most definitely part of Your will for him.  In Jesus's name~Amen.

My Daughter Amy

I long to see you again, for I remember your tears as we parted.  And I will be filled with joy when we are together again.  I remember your genuine faith, for you share the faith that first filled your grandmother Lois and your mother, Eunice.  And I know that same faith continues strong in you.  This is why I remind you to fan into flames the spiritual gift God gave you when I laid my hands on you.  For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.  (2 Timothy 1)

I don't think Julie cried when we left her.  :)  Amy did.  Of course.  We were leaving her in a "foreign" country, and for a much longer period of time.  So this Scripture reminds me of her.  I do long to see her again.  I will be filled with joy when we are together again.  I do remember, and even celebrate, her genuine faith that continues strong in her.  So now, Lord, teach her how to "fan into flames the spiritual gift [You] gave her."  You have given her a spirit of power, love, and self-discipline.  You have done, and continue to do, amazing things in her life, and I am humbly grateful for her and for Your work in her.  Use me in whatever way I can help with that work.  In Jesus's name~Amen.

 

Daily Prayer

1 Timothy 3:1-16 has to do in almost its entirety with elders and deacons.  I don't really know the exact difference between them.  Hi, Lord.  You know that my first unholy thoughts when I read these words concern those who don't meet these criteria.  I confess this, and I really do want You to redirect my thoughts to the proper place.

One not-quite-proper place may involve women in these roles.  There is so much that we women can (and do) offer in the responsibilities that elders and deacons carry.  I know...this is an area of great controversy in the church, dear Lord.  I don't mean to focus on controversy; so, I will pray that You will show me what I am supposed to see from this passage and from this controversy.

For Julie: endurance until this play is over!!  I think that will be Saturday night.  Bless her and cause her to be a great example to others that following You is exciting, meaningful, fulfilling--and often times, fun!

For Amy: continued patient faithful performance of the roles and responsibilities that she fills at Casa.  Bless those ninos, please.  Protect all of them spiritually, emotionally, and physically from every harm and evil.

I have a slight headache, Lord.  Just recovering from surgery, I am sure.  I'm going to take some medication.  Keep me faithful!  In Jesus's name~Amen.

Today's Scripture

2 Thessalonians 3:1-18~

Finally, dear brothers and sisters, we ask you to pray for us (Paul, Amy's young charge). Pray that the Lord’s message will spread rapidly and be honored wherever it goes, just as when it came to you.  Pray, too, that we (he) will be rescued from wicked and evil people, for not everyone is a believer. But the Lord is faithful; he will strengthen you (him) and guard you (him) from the evil one.  And we are confident in the Lord that you are doing and will continue to do the things we commanded you.  May the Lord lead your hearts (his heart) into a full understanding and expression of the love of God and the patient endurance that comes from Christ.

Lord, I will have to copy this prayer into the Friend of Stitch prayer blog for Paul.  I need this prayer for myself, and for my daughters as well.  I pray that we all will be rescued from wicked and evil people...............................it's an election year.....................................!!

I do also pray that Your message will spread rapidly and be honored wherever it goes.  I know it has reached TJ and NYC!  I am confident in You that my daughters, my husband, and I are doing and will continue to do the things that You command us in Your word.  Now please, according to Your word, lead our hearts into that full understanding and expression of the love of God and the patient endurance that comes from Christ.  In His name~~Amen!

It's All About You, Jesus

A wonderful praise song, Lord!  It is all about You!

I'm at home on this Sunday morning at 10:35 a.m. because I am only 4 days post-op.  The surgery on Wednesday went well, if the evidence so far is indicative.  Thank You that I don't have very much pain at all.

Uncle John's wake is today, and his funeral and burial are tomorrow.  Mom is on her way with Terri and Angie to southern New Jersey.  Please give them especially safe travel with the wind and the rain.  Mom gets so anxious.  I just drifted over to her FB page to ensure that Philippians 4:6-7 was posted there.  I hope she sees it.  Will You bring it to her attention?  Having sat through the seminar on anxiety with the psychologist who almost certainly was a Christian, I understand a little more that she has been programmed, hard-wired, to respond to life anxiously.  Please calm her.  Bless her.  She is a very loving woman, although bossy and difficult at times.  :)

My girls....  What have I done to deserve them?  That's the point, I think.  I don't deserve them.  Thank You for claiming their lives at a young age. 

Amy: what a ministry she has going on down in TJ.  She is learning so much about sharing her life and her faith through "lifestyle evangelism."  I don't even know what to ask for her, except the usual motherly things like safety and health.  Please open the hearts of the people--both kids and adults--at the orphanage to Your leaving Your home in glory (hardly like Holden!) to live among us and bring us the fantastic news of God's love for us.
 

Julie: her ministry at Fordham is no less important.  She has such a heart to serve the children of the city.  Please guide her in the Jump Start program with the preschoolers and the civics class with the high schoolers.  She's my social worker, although I don't think she knows it yet.  :)  Protect her, too, in the city.  Please set at least one brawny angel to guard her and to demonstrate to the forces of darkness that You will not allow her to be hurt as she goes about Your work.  Keep her up-to-date in her studies.  Keep her faith in You strong.

 My husband!  Thank You!!  He's at church, hopefully hearing the sermon and not having to intervene too much in the running of Junior Church.  Please give him strength, stamina, and insight into the work problem that he is trying to solve.  Thank You for giving me a partner with whom to serve You.  We've had a pretty great year in which to celebrate our 25 years of marriage.  He is the right choice for me, and I thank You that I waited for him.  :)

Okay, I am going to write on Paul's blog for a bit, then I think I'll go get ready for George to come home.  There is much more, no?  MOPS...Junior Church...work....  All about You, Jesus!  For Your sake~Amen.

 

My daughters

Lord, I have promised that I would not make idle promises to pray unless I actually do.  Writing my prayers is one way to keep myself accountable.

I promised to pray for Julie, especially during this week of "tech week" and hoping for a job.  She is working so hard and being so responsible.  Please bless her for her efforts to do things well, to do things for you.  Provide for her every need, as You have promised.  Give her strength, organization, efficiency, wisdom, knowledge, and energy.  (Is that all?  LOL)  Thank You for her concern for me after my surgery as well.  She is a wonderful daughter, and I am more than thankful that You gave her to us.

I promised to pray for Amy, too.  She hasn't blogged in a little while, but she did call us late last Sunday night.  Now come the days of drudgery, I suspect.  It's not novel any more, and the boredom of sameness sets in.  She needs to make it just about 6 weeks more, dear Lord, before she can come home to rest.  Please bless her daily ministry and her relationships.  Please bless Paul as well, my young man who is not yet a man.  This is such a sensitive age for him, a turning point age.  Please bring the right person or people into his life to hook him to You.  But back to Amy...please enrich her during these months of service in Tijuana.  Open her eyes to Your calling in her life.  I think she's seen some of it already!  Protect her spiritually and emotionally and (yes, I am a mother) physically.

For the sake of the kingdom of Christ~Amen.

Don!

Thank You for Don's overnight visit with us!  Please bless his travels and his life as he takes back control.