I often try to have a topic of some sort to talk over with You. Today, there is either too much--or nothing, depending on how I look at it. I could not even begin to sort through the myriad points on my prayer list; there are so many. Many of them are dear people in my life, and some are situations or issues that I would really love to discuss with You. But I feel bogged down. Bogged down by the "list," I think, as if it is important to check off each item when it is done.
I don't think that's what prayer is supposed to be. Is it? I try to get into the skin of the great heroes of the Bible and (impossibly) into Jesus's own heart and imagine their prayer lives. Did they have lists? I can imagine Jesus praying for each of his disciples when there were only a few of them, but when there were thousands, did He spend all that time talking about each one of them with You? I suspect not in the way that we often "pray" for people. Hospitalizations, illnesses, marriages and divorces, wayward children, cars and money and jobs...
The pastor in Iran, Saeed Abidini, who was recently convicted and sentenced to 8 years imprisonment, most definitely warrants prayer, though. Last night I was drifting off to sleep and was praying for him. What was I praying? I wasn't sure what was most aligned with Your will, although from a human and compassionate place I asked (and still do, by the way) that You might spare him this almost certain persecution and suffering. Then I wondered whether Your way of praying would focus on strengthening him and shielding his heart and spirit from the attack of evil as he passes through these very deep and dark times. In either case, or both, dear Heavenly Father, please accept my prayer joined with many others, I hope, for my unknown brother.
My children at Heritage...what a powerful letter from Kim Russo about Sara and Sam! To You be all the glory!!
My biological daughters, one being a "mother" in Tijuana and one being a student and volunteer in the Bronx...would You encourage them today and guard their hearts, minds, souls, and very lives in places that my mother's heart finds dangerous.
My own mother, recently widowed and living relatively successfully with macular degeneration: she had dental work on Monday, and may I pray that she is recovering with minimal pain?
My mother-in-law, who frustrates me many times, who is living much more unsuccessfully with macular degeneration (from 20/60 to 20/400): soften my heart and hers, please.
My dear husband, faithful in every way (but dieting, but even for this period of time he is "counting points"): What can I say? He is a true gift. He needs a sharp, quick mind in his job, and he grows tired. Fuel him, please?
See what I mean? The list has so many items on it. I think I might rather just sit, or kneel (for as long as I could), with You and feel Your eyes looking into mine and only by the grace of Jesus have the boldness to look back into Your eyes, and melt. Boldness not from myself, I emphasize, but boldness and confidence because of the blood of Christ all over me:
Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus (Hebrews 10:19)So, dear God, time's a-wastin'. I am blessed to have a job that in most ways and at most times I really love. Make my remaining time this morning exceptionally efficient, please, to bring glory to You. In Jesus's name, in the power of the Holy Spirit, and for the sake of the Gospel and the Kingdom~~~Amen
No comments:
Post a Comment