Poetry. I have often wished that I had that gift. I think that some of what is labeled "poetry" really isn't, but true poetry moves me. The book of Lamentations does.
I (and I wish I didn't use the word "I" so much!) have avoided writing because almost as soon as I sit down to write, my eyes tear up. The world, and especially this country, is such a mess. Some people, like my DH, are very disconnected from the problems and live in their cocoons without seeming to realize that destruction could very well lie ahead, and not in the distance. Judgment is so much closer than many want to recognize. In these recent Bible readings of Jeremiah and Lamentations (but not only there), You mention promised punishment and discipline really often, God.
And Your people sometimes suffer right alongside the sinners.
These are sobering thoughts, and juxtaposing them with "the joy of the Lord" is oxymoronic on its face. I guess that is what I take away from Lamentations, and the commentaries that I heard today: it's not only just okay, but necessary and spiritually healthy, to lament and question and emote to You. You kmow our hearts anyway; why hide? (Adam and Eve, that was dumb.)
If this is how I get to know You better, then I am all in. Even as I sit here, I imagine (or do I sense?) You sitting next to me. And here come the tears. I imagine Your foreknowledge of all that You had to endure, and I imagine Your wanting to share some of Your deepest thoughts--just the ones You know I can handle right now. We commiserate; we grieve over this fallen world and the misled people we both love. And we go forward, in large part because it is impossible to go back. (Rather like I felt once or twice during labor!)
I love You, God, as I have said before, so much and still not enough. May it grow.
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