Over and over and over...May Your will be done, God. I am concerned for this country. I am concerned for Your church. I am concerned for my children's generation and the future we are creating for them. Be glorified, dear Lord! Light shines brightest in darkness, and the darkness seems to be getting darker. Let me shine Your light, be a light, and attract people's eyes to You. In Jesus's name~Amen.
The problems of this country *are* urgent, Father. I have appreciated the stance of the denomination that our older daughter attends, the Brethren in Christ, regarding blind American patriotism (of course, they put it much more gently and effectively, but still....). At the very same time, I am concerned. We are commanded--ordered, mandated!--by You to pray for our leaders. I even hate to call the President a leader, and yet he is leading a fair number of people known as his "base." Leading them to racism, sexism and sexual immorality, hatred, pride, thoughtlessness, and mediocrity, inconsiderate selfishness, and isolationism. Wow. And many of the "leaders" of our churches are supporting him!
Will it take breaking us, Lord? It may. It probably should. We have grown comfortable in our affluence. We have grown comfortable in our sin! Break my heart for what breaks Yours, as the song goes. Break my hard heart. I pray this first for myself, although I wish I could pray it for the American people. But I know that no one can repent for another person.
(PS Speaking of that, may I bug You some more for the boyfriend of my younger daughter? For him to commit to You, to follow You, to know You?)
Well, Lord, may Your kingdom come! Love You. Amen~~
Father God, I am worried about this nation. I hesitate to call it "my" country any more; I know that my citizenship is secure in heaven. Still, my earthly father served in the military in this country, and I cringe to see what it has become. So, in short (because this is a secret blog and husband is coming home in minutes), please intervene. The evil, the lies, are more than disheartening. I can imagine that our enemy--our enemies?--and our Enemy are enjoying this debacle. Please intervene, for Your glory and the good of Your kingdom and Your people. In Jesus's name, Who belongs to all nations~Amen.
Father God, I sometimes act as if You are not still in full control and command of the world. I am so sorry for my lack of faith. I do know that at times You allow things to "get out of control" to show rebellious people (like myself) that we would do so much better to submit to Your ways of doing things. I also know that You love Your people and have done--and will do--amazing things to protect and rescue them in the middle of those out-of-control teaching moments. So, strengthen my faith, please. The GDP report was just released, and it is good. I can celebrate that! I also ask that You weaken my anger and my frustration and my preoccupation with the next stupid thing done by the President. Yes, a Trump-free day would be refreshing. Let me rest in knowing YOU.
I got stuck, Lord, regarding what I really wanted to spend time here talking about with You. I have been charmed by the Harry Potter stories, despite some of the concerns about witchcraft. (BTW, I thought it wasn't nearly as bad as many may have described, and I thought there were surprising references to Christian and Biblical holidays and principles and, on a couple of occasions, quoted Scripture.) So, I initially wanted a post to be titled "The Pensive," a nod to the container of memories in Dumbledore's office. But then...my deep and deepening concern about this country and the world. I almost said "my" country, but I corrected myself. I no longer identify with the United States of America. Some of my disconnect has been prompted by my daughters, particularly the older one who worships in a Brethren in Christ church. Another huge piece of my disillusionment comes from the weirdness, the craziness, of the current government and especially its leader (aka the President). I get angry; I refer to him by unflattering, even insulting, terms; I want him to fail. Then I realize that I am not praying for him as You have commanded. I am also supposed to "love" him. How? He is, I am convinced, leading the nation astray! He is a liar, an adulterer, a selfish and ungodly person. And still, the President. How did that happen? I wonder, truly, if anyone else sees the possibility that the election interference so widely discussed and all but proven did have an effect. Or, in another vein, are Americans that evil and stupid? It certainly seems that he caters to the darker side of human nature--the racism, the sexism, the selfishness, the xenophobia. So much darkness, so much sin. Light needs to shine, and if this is a time for Your light to be carried by Your people, then Lord, let me be one of the lightbearers. I fear that some of Your people are being misled, in the words of Matthew 24:24--"so as to mislead, if possible, even the elect." May I not be among the misled. "Teach me to pray!"
"When the foundations are being destroyed, what can the righteous do?" —Psalms 11:3
I cannot even call him "our" President. I saw a title of a news article that claimed he "is not your president." (The Washington Post, June 1, 2018, Greg Sargent) Unfortunately, I agree. And I have put off writing in this prayer journal, despite many promptings in my spirit to pray for him. It is hard to pray for someone that you believe is an idiot, and an evil one at that. But I am under compulsion, out of obedience to the Word:
"I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving [choke!] be made for all people--for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness."
Oh, my.
I think sometimes he believes he is more king than president. I *know* that he has little to no idea about law, protocol, even the idea that he represents ALL of the citizens of the United States, and not just the ones called "his base." So, dear God, Ruler of everything--truly, and not because of some false belief--please bless him. Somehow, work Your will through him though he is a faulted, fallible, possibly even corrupt leader. You have done it before! Please bring him to repentance. ...which brings me to another request: Your name is being besmirched. Because (for reasons that I fail to comprehend) evangelical leaders are embracing this president, Convict them--us--of our hypocrisy and shallowness. Let Your Spirit loose among us to bring us to our knees in the sadness of conviction. Include me as well, God. And don't let me shrink back from speaking truth, but do let me say true things lovingly. In Jesus's name~~Amen.
So, Lord, tomorrow I face a giant: Someone in a position of power and political clout, a bully, a taunter. I know I don't have a lot of time here to pray, and I want to ask You for ... peace, confidence, eloquence, and justice. I am not in this for revenge but for justice. The favoritism at work is destructive and disheartening, and the opposite of it, which is the condemnation and bullying, is also destructive and disheartening. Please allow me to be calm and fully in Your presence during the hearing. May I speak only the words that You put in my mouth, and may they be truth and healing. The purpose is that: truth and healing. May You be glorified! In Jesus's name~~Amen.
Week after week during football season, I suffer. I know, Lord, that it sounds trivial and stupid. It is. And yet, I suffer. Tomorrow will be no different. Well, on second thought, it might be different. It might be worse. The quarterback for "my" team was (slightly) injured during practice a few days ago. The injury (throwing-hand thumb knuckle) is not, in and of itself, serious, but anything could affect accuracy. And I have already started to obsess and feel sick in my stomach. Please, dear Lord, when so many are burdened with far more serious, even life-and-death problems, take this silly anxiety away from me. I have considered the possibility, maybe even the probability, that this accidental injury was part of Your will for this team this year. How else to think about this freak event? Maybe this is not supposed to be "their" year. Show me, please, how to cope with the anxiety. Even better, please, take it away from me! And may Your will be done in everything. In Jesus's name~~Amen.
Ah, those words, Lord, give me a deadline. 🤣 I do NOT want anyone, including my DH, to have access to this private prayer place. So, here I am. Thank You for the blessing of this "journal" online. It is more private than a written journal, although I would not mind such a diary of my communications with you (if computers ever become impossible to use). There continue to be many things about which to pray. Sometimes I think, and sometimes I have thought, that there are too many things! It is impossible for a human--a mere mortal--to pray about "everything" that warrants prayer. In my reading so far this year, much of it in the Old Testament, I notice that the patriarchs were just plain "faithful." They had to take care of their daily affairs in a much more time-cumbersome way than I do! But that left them little time to "pray" about "everything." They had to pray differently, and I expect that it came down to 1) worshiping You, and 2) asking for Your help with those daily affairs. On a slightly different note, since I titled this post after my DH's message, I need to ask You to reduce my irritation at him. He is such a loving guy. Sometimes, though, he is not a thinking (not to be confused with thoughtful) guy. He does not consider the meta-message of his words or actions. But the heart! Oh, his heart is good. Help my irritation, please. I--not so much he, but I--need to change. So! I am racing the clock, and he did say "...by noon." I love You, God, and I want to be more -- well, as I said earlier in this post, just plain faithful. In Jesus's name~~Amen.
Music to my mama-heart! My YD sent me those words yesterday to ask for prayer support for her classroom observation this week. I want to be faithful to the request and the promise to pray; thus, this entry. Dear Heavenly Father, I have poured out my heart to You for my daughters. I have recently shared with You my (mild) concern about the "unequally-yoked" relationship this daughter has with her boyfriend, an admittedly high-quality, loving, superb man. (And still seeking You, I hope.) But I digress. This prayer is for YD and her performance in the classroom during the evaluation. I ask confidence for her. I request clarity and command of the material. I petition You to intervene in her students' hearts and minds to calm them and to make them receptive to her instruction. I beseech (what a strong, lovely word!) You to shine Your light through her, Your vessel, for the purpose of declaring Your power and glory. "This book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth..." (an old version that I once memorized) A newer translation is this:
Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Joshua 1:8
May this be so for her! In Jesus's name and for the sake of His reputation~~Amen.
Over and over and over...May Your will be done, God.
