Sydney Allen

Oh, God!  How tragic this event that took a 3-year-old baby girl's life!  1 Thessalonians 4:13 says,

Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.

May we not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.  May we, and especially the Allens, grieve with the comfort that comes only from You.  Supernatural, extraordinary comfort that is next to impossible for the human mind to comprehend but which our regenerate hearts can glimpse.

Wishing for a Long Time

Lord, it's just before 10 a.m. today, and I will have to get to work on time for 11:30 a.m.  :(  In between, I need to package some things for Julie and send out a quick invitation to the MOPS gals for Sunday.  I am still dripping wet from my shower!  Thank You that You are master of time, and the number of minutes I spend here is not indicative of my prayer or of Your love.

So--Do I have a blind spot when it comes to that patient at work?  I seem to butt heads with the psychiatrist over him.  He is a pain; that is not the issue.  In fact, in general it seems that we are ("we" meaning the professional staff) failing to treat most of our patients with dignity and respect.  However, I digress.  My initial question concerned a blind spot.  If I have one, dear Lord, reveal it to me and open my eyes.  This stalemate, this conflict is not comfortable (although my comfort is not the goal here).

Please bless both my daughters, but especially Julie this week at Lakeside.  Please give her extra wisdom, maturity, patience, love, and endurance.  Show her a glimpse of Yourself?  That will keep her going!  She's a special one.  May she bless You right back.

I wish I didn't have to go.  I have SO much more to pray about.  Accept this small entry as a token of my praying without ceasing, but having no evidence to support that.  :)  I love You!  Amen.

In the "Garden"

That may not be the best title for this post, Lord, but it reflects my wish to spend time in the quiet place in my heart--Your garden--with You.

Today's One Year Bible reading is Paul's testimony to ... Jerusalem?  In this part of the story, he speaks Greek to the commander of the barracks and Aramaic to the crowd.  This made me think of Franklin, and his interest in languages for the purpose of translating Scripture for those who have no version for themselves.  Please bless that young man, Lord, and preserve his life and health for the furtherance of Your Kingdom.

One part of the passage that I wondered about was this: "The God of our fathers has chosen you to know his will and to see the Righteous One and to hear words from his mouth."  Would this mean me, too?  "You will be his witness to all men of what you have seen and heard.  And now what are you waiting for?"  This fits well with the premise of David Platt's book Follow Me, that our only purpose and Your overriding will is to tell all people the message.

Oh, to spend more time here with You.  It's almost 9 a.m., and I have to mail that Keurig K-cup holder today, and I haven't showered yet, and I have to be at work by 11:30 a.m.  For a day alone....

Love You, dear Lord!

PS  Blessings on Julie!  She is probably exhausted in her work at Lakeside.

Thoughts from Follow Me

Hi, Lord.  I took a sick day from work today, and in truth I feel a little off.  Despite that, I accomplished a great deal today, not the least of which is making this entry.

David Platt's premise in Follow Me is a very powerful argument: that our only and most important calling in life is to follow Christ "radically" (related to the title of his other book).  Nothing else matters.  That does not, paradoxically, mean that we become spartan or that we quit our jobs to "minister" full time.  It does mean that everything is subjected to the ultimate purpose of evangelizing.

So, here I am.  I am about to make cupcakes for Amy's friend Samantha's bridal shower on Saturday. Of course, it is about 80 degrees in the house.  :)  Sacrifice!!  Love you, Lord, and may You be glorified by me at the shower, at work, everywhere!

One Thousand Dollars

Oh, my goodness, Lord.  I wish my husband had been more understanding about our daughter's desire (call?) to return to Mexico for a week of celebration for all the ones whom she has grown to love.  However, he did it.  We are contributing half of the above amount to make this trip happen.  Please bless this step of faith and obedience.  How does one ever really know what You are calling her to do?  Paul--you, the after-apostle--you seemed to know even when it didn't make "sense."  Lord, please confirm this in some way.  We are not very experienced at this following thing, certainly not as much as our years of living with You might suggest.  And bless her trip, her friends, and most of all, her.  In Jesus's name and by Your Spirit~~Amen.

Praying Julie Home

Ahh, Lord!  The weather for flying is terrible.  Please help.  I started to try to specify how I want You to help, but I believe You already know what to do.  Please bring all those young people to the ground safely and return them all to their families.  I beg You to be gracious and redirect the storms OR the flight to ensure their safety.  Please.  In Jesus's name~Amen

For Junior Church

The weight of responsibility for Junior Church is sometimes heavy, dear Lord.  Please touch some people's hearts to help this Sunday.  I need to put together the June schedule, but we have to get this Sunday set immediately.  I'm pleading.  I'm not just asking.  This is for You and Your work in the lives of these precious children.  In a minute or two, I will send out another email.  Would You bless it with fruit?  In Your wonderful name, so worth sharing~~Amen and amen.

Julie in Montana

Lord, I checked the weather forecast for Ashland, MT, and it looks like thunderstorms today and rain until Friday.  :(  And the team is camping.  I remember a "camping" trip with Crossroads many (many) years ago that was wet and miserable, and You impressed James 1 onto my heart:

Consider it all joy, my brethren (and sisters), when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.  And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.  (verses 2-4)

Well worth memorizing for myself, and  I will also pray this for the GO West team.  Please guard Julie's heart from any bitterness over the bad weather, and shine Your Spirit through her joy.  This is an amazing adventure that she is on!  Open the eyes of her heart, Lord.  She wants to see You.  Please grant that desire of her heart.

And from my mother-heart, please bring her home safely and well.  I am really looking forward to the trip home with her (although I suspect she will sleep some or most of the drive).

Holy Spirit, I ask You for special work in Julie's life during these last few days of this ministry.  Do Your thing.  You know that I am asking this for Julie's sake, of course, and also for the sake of the spread of the Kingdom--Your Kingdom--through Jesus Christ and for the glory of God.  Amen!!

Julie GO'd West

Father God, I have been holding Julie in my thoughts since she left a week ago for Colorado on the Global Outreach (GO) trip to the West.  I haven't had as much time to write, though.  Please accept this prayer for her retrospectively and prospectively.  The messages that the team members are posting on the information line seem positive and even fun!  I ask for her a chance to share You with the others, a glimpse of Your call on her life, and an experience that will stay in her memory as a wonderful time.  Please keep all of them from sickness and exhaustion.  Refresh their bodies as they camp even as You refresh their spirits every day.  I can hardly wait until I can hear all her stories, told in her funny, pithy way.  Guard her closely and protect her from every evil.  In Jesus's name and in the leading of the Holy Spirit, for the sake of Your kingdom in Julie's life and through her as well~~Amen.



My Alone Time

God, I know my time is extremely limited this afternoon.  Without going into all the details of the tasks awaiting me, please allow me to spend this completely necessary time alone with You to refresh.  I am uncomfortable even doing this at home.  Interested "nosy" eyes look at what I am writing, and sometimes this is intensely personal stuff.

And that is, after all, what prayer is supposed to be.  As I sit here and think about that statement--"what prayer is supposed to be"-- I also recall that prayer is supposed to be a time of devoting myself to You, to adoring You, to appreciating You.  You really have been amazing (more so than normal, which is amazing) throughout our trip to pick up Amy in Tijuana.  I, on the other hand, have not been so amazing.  Man, has my sin appeared.  I leap to justifying my behaviors, of course; after all, I am a normal human in that regard.  I don't think I can even begin to acknowledge the specifics; I still have an emotional reaction to the situations.  I will surrender, God.  I am an inappropriate, imperfect, sinful woman, and I have quick and judgmental reactions to people.  I need much more "tolerance" (though I hate that word) for people who are less than perfect, too.  (My DH falls into that category, of course.)

So, over the past month I have been...lonely.  There are not very many, if any, people to whom I can talk openly and without fear of judgment.  I have retreated into my relationship with You even more.  I don't think that's all that great.  Not that it isn't wonderful to tell You everything, and hopefully to listen to You and learn.  I run the risk of becoming "right in my own eyes" but not in the views of others.  And then, to complicate matters even further, I run the risks (plural) of measuring my success by others' opinions of me OR of not caring to verify my truths with others.  Oy.  My head begins to hurt.

Ideally, God, I would be in such close communication with You that only Your approval and direction would matter to me.  Would You allow that for me?  I'd really like it.

Oh, for more time!  In Jesus's name and in the fullness of the Holy Spirit~Amen.

For My Babies

Lord, I am rushing.  Sweetly and simply, may they (my daughters) both finish strong.  Julie: clear mind through exhaustion.  Amy: grace and love through sorrow over leaving La Casa.  In Jesus's name and in the power of the Holy Spirit, Amen~

Daughters

Amy: THROWING UP!  Tijuana version of Montezuma's Revenge?  We face-timed after her message about the vomiting; so, I know that she is all right, if a little dizzy/queasy.  Dear Father, this last week of her time there is precious--and emotionally weird.  It sounds like she has learned a lot, some of which she may not have wanted to learn.  Help her to integrate these lessons into her life and into herself in a way which testifies to Your love and makes her a better minister of the Gospel.  And...let's bring her home safely!

Julie: GO retreat this weekend, final classes next week, and some final exams before May 10th.  I'm tired just typing this.  Dear Father, bless her with efficiency and a wonderful closeness to You such that she knows as she has never known before the filling and power of the Holy Spirit.  Thank You for her ministry in a more secular environment.  Please give her opportunities to share not only her "faith" but You Yourself.  Be glorified~

~in both my daughters' lives and in my own as well.  What gifts, what blessings they are to me!  I am so eager to be with them over the San Diego trip.  Please make our time together sweet fellowship.

And PS, a selfish request: and I will understand if You say no: Could we get that 2-bedroom condo while we are there?  (In the face of the poverty that both girls have been and will be witnessing, this is a strange thing to ask, I know... )

Sophomore Year Finals

Dear Gracious and Omniscient Father God--yeah, I sound like Eugene Meltsner or Spencer Reid, don't I?--please bless my daughter Julie during these last days of her sophomore year.  She is sending me a 15-page research paper to review tonight, and then she goes into finals week.  Give her rest, even if she shorts herself on sleep.  Please make her studying very efficient, her retention of the material almost "anal" (haha), and her ability to recount what she has learned effective and persuasive on papers and finals.  I am excited to have her coming with us to get Amy from the orphanage!  I can't pray here for much longer since I am at work, but I did want to get this off my mind and into Your heart (although I really do know I can do that without writing it.)  In Jesus's name~~Amen.

For Julie

Julie's my more silent daughter, Lord.  :)  Please bless her during these last 2-3 weeks of school with clear thinking, learning, efficiency, faithfulness, and joy.  I trust that You are pursuing her (not that she is running away from you) since the cares of this world can interfere with anyone's relationship with you.

Miguelito's Eye

Father, please bless the surgeons who are operating on Miguelito's lazy eye.  Give them steadiness, focus, extra skill, and extra grace.  Please touch Miguelito's little heart as well as his little body with Your loving and healing hands.  Fill Amy with such grace and love and wisdom that it effortlessly pours from her all over him.  May he be blanketed with peace as You heal him, and I ask a special guard against anything that could interfere with or interrupt this wonderful work that is being done--that You are doing--for him.  In Jesus's name and by the healing work of the Holy Spirit in this age~~Amen.

Daughter's Medical Ignorance

Dear Heavenly Father, You are the Great Physician, and my oldest daughter is so ignorant.  Please protect her from her lack of knowledge about medications and restore her from having taken the Naproxen, an NSAID, when she is "allergic" to that category of drugs.  I want to wake her up way out in Tijuana, but it is only 6:20 a.m. there and I would imagine that she is sound asleep, perhaps even more because she is sick.  This is incredibly hard for me as Mama, You know.  My heart races to reach her and educate her and get her to an epi-pen!! Or at least Benadryl or some other antihistamine.  But here I sit, Lord, forcing myself to pray.  Please...please protect her and heal her.  This is one act of faith on my part.  You graciously indulged my anxiety last night by having her respond to me.  Now, please, wake her up just enough to respond again, if I may be so bold--actually, so weak--to ask.

I know...I get a little bit annoyed with all the people who pray for medical problems and healing.  This is hypocritical of me.  Forgive my two-faced hypocrisy, I ask, since You, too, have the heart of a parent and understand the desire to keep Your children from harm--even if the harm is brought on by their own stupidity.  In fact, maybe especially because of their own stupidity!

Lord, there is so little time to pray.  I would do this for hours--pray, that is.  But I have responsibilities and I must attend to the rapid passage of time.  Please make time for our praying soon?  I love You, and I trust that You love my daughter and will keep her in Your hands until her body can get rid of the medicine.  In the power of the Holy Trinity who love and serve each other~~Amen.

Bold Speech

Luke 11:37 Jesus Criticizes the Religious Leaders

Oh, my goodness, Lord!

Luke 12:1 A Warning Against Hypocrisy

Double-oh, my goodness, Lord!!

This is a minefield for me.  I am quick to criticize "religious leaders," and then I do find myself wondering at my own hypocrisy.  Please work in my heart to see as You see, to hold everything including myself up to Your high standards, but not to judge.  That responsibility belongs to You alone.  Just because others do not see things as I see them does not (necessarily) mean that they are wrong.  That is the normal way of interpreting the world, though.  How does one know when one is right?  Holy Spirit, You need to lead me into all truth, and that must include the truth about being right--and wrong.  I will listen, though I know it will take practice and humility.  I don't have enough of either.  In Jesus's name, for the sake of the kingdom of God, and by the tutelage of the Holy Spirit I pray~~Amen.

Two Months!

My last post here, Lord, was almost two months ago!!  Yikes.  No excuses, since You know everything already.  :)  What do busy people do for prayer time?  I really dislike the pace that prohibits a lengthy, or lengthier, time of prayer.  (And just now, I had to run to the bathroom.)  I wonder...whether the Devil interferes with times of prayer on purpose.  It would make sense that he would want to interrupt communications between You, our commander, and us, your soldiers.

I don't have very much time even now, because I have a podiatry appointment within the hour (plus 4 minutes, according to the computer clock).  One quick prayer: MOPS Ladies' Night at our house on Friday.  Please bless it all.  I need to prepare, clean, and "mentor."  Dearest Lord, this is all for You and the spiritual growth of these young women.  I am Your handmaiden, maidservant, and obedient daughter.  Thank You for all of those privileges.  In Jesus's name and by the indwelling Holy Spirit's power and guidance~~Amen.

Random Prayer Promises

• David Huillca: trabajo!
• Kassidy Jones: application to Monty Tech

My Sick Baby Girl

Dear Father God, I need to pray quickly because my time is running out on this Ash Wednesday.  My baby (age 20, but still....) is sick.  She has flu, strep, ear infection, and now apparent conjunctivitis.  Please heal her.  Bring her rest and relief from her discomfort and pain.  (On a side selfish note, it is nice to have her home.)  Restore her to life and ministry for her sake and, more importantly, for Your sake.  In Jesus's powerful healing name~~Amen!