Sometimes I get so up-in-my-thoughts that I literally forget to journal my prayer, my conversations with You. It's not that I am not talking to You all day long. I do that from morning until bedtime. It's more that the disciplines of prayer, reflection, solitude, and journaling take time. There is so much to do in my life and work that I move from task to task and neglect this time with You.
It's also that I don't want to journal while DH is in the home. He and I seem to be in different places spiritually. I hate saying that because I, of course, think that I am more spiritually mature than he is, deeper and more ... I guess I am not sure what word to choose. However, I have seen and heard passivity and superficiality in his prayers and his priorities. I am admittedly frustrated by this at times; why, when many wives have this same issue with their husbands, do I feel entitled to a spouse on the same spiritual level as I am (I think, anyway)?
You know, Father Abba, that we had difficulty when our younger daughter married an "unbeliever," and after all that, that man may be a more spiritually mature person than many so-called "Christians." What do I do with that recognition?
I need to talk to You about so many other things as well, but DH is on his way home from a craft fair and I want to--yeah, I know--make some progress on the Christmas tree.
(Why do I cry when worship music plays??)
I love You so much.
